I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Randomize
