Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.

  (1-607): View more from New York

  I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (607): Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom. (1-607): I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts. http://tfl.nu/s0vw
  Replies (15) Good night (2494) Bad night (1342)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (646): I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11. http://tfl.nu/ga7m
  Replies (11) Good night (2958) Bad night (707)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces. http://tfl.nu/d897
  Replies (12) Good night (4702) Bad night (853)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now

  (1-805): View more from California

  he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now (1-805): he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls http://tfl.nu/00r7
  Replies (82) Good night (5015) Bad night (1387)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not. http://tfl.nu/y4k4
  Replies (12) Good night (2554) Bad night (6081)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building. http://tfl.nu/resy
  Replies (7) Good night (3817) Bad night (1590)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid http://tfl.nu/99tk
  Replies (3) Good night (4728) Bad night (794)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him. http://tfl.nu/hp2h
  Replies (6) Good night (1843) Bad night (846)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take. http://tfl.nu/cnz2
  Replies (10) Good night (992) Bad night (1651)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs http://tfl.nu/j07e
  Replies (1) Good night (1537) Bad night (589)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now. http://tfl.nu/akfs
  Replies (6) Good night (897) Bad night (1729)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye http://tfl.nu/wt8g
  Replies (5) Good night (616) Bad night (914)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with http://tfl.nu/09mm
  Replies (5) Good night (1297) Bad night (633)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send http://tfl.nu/fpx2
  Replies (5) Good night (920) Bad night (429)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore http://tfl.nu/mshh
  Replies (2) Good night (842) Bad night (432)

Randomize