dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
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He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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