It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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