so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
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