well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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