I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
I wish i was in the wii world.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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