i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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