I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize