normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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