Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Randomize
