You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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