Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize