Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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