Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
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