The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
