If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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