Me too!
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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