Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
