Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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