My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
He shit in the fireplace
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
