I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I intend to get homeless drunk
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
