is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
