I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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