I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Randomize
