You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.