The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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