Nicole vs. Life
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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