this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
