Quick, to the slutcave!
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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