I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Randomize
