Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
