He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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