On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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