Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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