I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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