dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
tell your sister to shave her snatch
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!