Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Michael Bay diarrhea
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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