I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize