i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Randomize
