I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
