DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize