we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
