people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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