Heybabeimwearingurpanties
They should really pass out barf bags in church
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Randomize
