he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Randomize
