i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
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Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
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I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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