Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
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