Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
