Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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