North Korea, Best Korea!
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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