Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
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